Too Literal?

Brooding Google Dudes, Balls Deep in Thought

Ah... its great to be 16 again, right guys?

The sad thing is that it only took about 2-3 minutes of my time to find these.

Fly Like an Eagle

As the great Steve Miller Band posited many years ago and then later, repeated by Seal in the movie Space Jam starring Michael Jordan as Michael Jordan, that "time keeps on slipping into the future." And in this amazingly polished Turd, Nick M. attempts to ask, "Does it?".

Hip Mister

Now this is one Turd I can get behind because it so masterfully encapsulates the Lomo (ironically my phone wanted to autospell that as pompous) look.  We got the cross-processing effect, slight vignetting, and holy macaroni a full bleed 35mm frame.  But this work of art doesn't stop there, no sir.  Here our subject is a nonchalant, mustachioed male, perfectly projecting a look of "Whatever, I know that's probably a booger in my nose, but who gives a shit? You see how Lomo'd I am? I'm art now, bitch. " And that's the type of attitude that gets your art Turds on a print in the Urban Outfitters clearance section.

Curtains

This Turd comes courtesy of my bedroom, where many a Turd have been polished before it.

Art at work, whaaaaaaaaat?!

There was just something about these paper clips that spoke to me saying, "We can probably be art, I guess."

Oh So Moody

Just look at the way the angles of the room work with the black and white film effect fading into the vignette surrounding this wonderfully boring bedroom. Holy moley, that's some good art.

Andy Warhol's Toilet

Literally turning shit into art.

Welcome

Welcome to Polishing Digital Turds, a blog I created to showcase some of the finest non-intentional works of art created by my cell phone. In lieu of the recent explosion of amateurs turned auteurs via the digital revolution of "retro" or "lomo" cell phone camera apps, I decided that I too want to be a cell phone artist and looking at all the masterworks of my contemporaries on Facebook and the like, I thought to myself, "Man, it sure would be cool to make every picture I take look like an Urban Outfitters advertisement." So I journeyed to my cell phone's app market and downloaded Vignette, a camera app with many a retro, lomo, and hipster effect that would provide endless possibilities for me in my creation of “art”, and oh boy did it ever. I realized that I could set Vignette to apply a set of random effects and even random frames for the pictures, and just snap away without a care. The resulting shots of banal, everyday places and things turned incredible works of art just gave me too much joy to contain. I thought to myself again, "Man, you need to share some of these masterpieces with the world." and then, "Hey man, I'm right, I should do that.", followed by, "Yo dude, I did it." And so here we are, Polishing Digital Turds. This blog will be updated daily with shots of whatever the hell I feel like pointing my cell phone at and then letting Vignette handle all the boring stuff it's been programmed to do, because let's face it, I'm a busy man and I don't have time to be using my imagination or honing any actual photography skills. No, I'd much rather suck all the fun and adventure out of taking pictures and leave the creativity to a machine.